Men, I get it. It’s intimidating meeting your girlfriends friends for the first time, but it’s going to happen eventually. If you show a lack of enthusiasm, you’re going to be stepping in hot water. It’s important to women that you get along with their social circle because their friends are an extension of their life.
Now that you know the importance, you can understand that one of the major dating deal breakers for women is refusing to meet their friends. What you may see as wanting to do something else with your time, she will most definitely see as you denying a part of herself.
Phycologists say there are three main reasons people deny meeting their new significant others friends: It makes things feel like they’re going too fast, they’re afraid that their friends won’t be accepting, or you think it will change your perception of the person you’re dating.
Things Are Moving Too Fast
There’s no handbook to tell you when you should do what. Do you really have to wait for your third date to have sex? When is it okay to go on a vacation together? How long should you wait before you start dropping the ‘L’ word? Doing any of those things too soon can make it seem like you’re taking the relationship too far too fast. This is usually the way men see meeting the friends. If you’re hesitant to meet her friends because you think you’re not ready, don’t hold out! Her friends are just that– her friends. She’s not introducing you to her parents, and she’s not forcing you to be more committed just by meeting them. There’s nothing to be worried about when you meet the friends!
You’re Afraid They Won’t Like You
This is a big one, and it goes both ways. Guys think their girlfriends won’t like them, and girls think their guy’s friends won’t like them. When you finally meet them, you should always remember: It doesn’t matter! Sure if they don’t like you it will sting a little, but it’s not going to change the bond the two of you share together. But more importantly than that you should keep in mind that her and her friends are friends for a reason– they probably have similar likes, interests, and taste in personalities. The chances of her liking you and her friends not is very slim.
It Will Change Your Opinion Of Her
You’re dating a smart, sophisticated woman who reads Hemingway and has a nose for old oak red wines. But when you meet her friends, they’re all Paris Hilton wannabes who talk about nothing but shopping and their favorite tanning salons. Guys tend to judge the people they date by the company they keep, but it’s a classic mistake. If your girlfriend’s friends are polar opposites of her, you should consider that a good thing! It means that she doesn’t judge people, and she accepts people who are unlike herself.
If you’re worried about meeting the friends, brush it off! Otherwise you’re going to find yourself at the start of yet another dating site search.