The hardest part about getting back into the dating world is being hung up on your ex. Dating with a broken heart is like planning a road trip without a car– Sure you can walk, but that sort of defeats the purpose, doesn’t it?
If you’re getting out of a relationship and are looking to get into a new one, here’s a few tips to help you heal.
Figure out what reminds you of them and avoid it!
If you know logging onto Facebook means you’re going to be searching your ex’s profile, then stay off Facebook for a while. Having a constant reminder of them is the easiest way to keep them on your mind, which is the opposite of your goal. Packing up records, pictures and movies that remind you of them is a good way to get them out of your mind as well. Give yourself a week to be sad, then put serious effort into staying away from anything that triggers memories of them.
Always think in terms of 30 minutes
In an age where we can connect with people in countless ways (e-mail, text messages, bbms, Facebook notes, tweets…), it’s easy to send that regrettable message to an ex. If you have something to tell them or are simply yearning to hear their voice on a particularly lonesome night, give yourself 30 minutes before you do so. In that time, you’ll usually either get over wanting to contact them, or you’ve rethought what it was you were going to say, so it reads as something you won’t kick yourself for later.
Call up the gossip queen
Everyone has that friend that knows everything about everyone. Hearing about other people’s problems and dilemmas will help you forget about your heartache and will be a good source of entertainment. Having friends around to help you get your mind off of things can always make things easier, especially when they talk enough to not have time to think about your loss.
Distract yourself with online dating
Dating someone you have genuine interest in can be harmful to your future with them. The first person you’re with is often a rebound that leads no where, so if you like this person, it’s better to make them worth the wait until you’ve gotten over your ex. Instead of chasing someone you’ve had a crush on before, try online dating! The attention you’ll get from it will be a great distraction, and you’ll be able to get your rebound out of the way with someone who you don’t have personal ties with.
Go to a concert
Believe it or not, phycologists say that going to a concert can be one of the best ways to get over an ex. Having such high adrenaline will give you the same endorphins that being in love makes you feel, so you’re able to connect positive feelings with a thing (the concert and the music) instead of a person. Transferring your feelings to anything other than your ex will relax your mind.
Whatever you do– get distractions! Sitting at home crying and eating ice cream won’t do it anymore. If you want to get over your ex, you have to put effort into it! Take these tips and start moving on.